Did I know the extent of the damage I had done to myself in judging  the past? I carried it with me like truckloads of judged  art that no one loved.

INflamed tissues, bleeding from within bursting with  unforgiven tears, stopped healthy growth in its tracts.

Yes, i prevented me from prospering, from releasing  that which  needed to go

i was like a thing that had eaten away at itself.

thinking i was revealing the wrongs of others,  them,  i was also striking at me that i could not see

thank u other, i bow to you , i owe my ever greater vision of wholeness to

you

Thinking i was due what they had earned ate away at my sense of self. My gifts went cold waiting for my gratitude and attention.

i lost  desire to nurture  all of me.

yes, all the proper emotions are there to make me a fitting case for sympathy. yet sympathy is inadequate to heal a broken heart. it is too weak  to penetrate into the depths of pain waiting to be healed

decisive , soft, fiercely true , is the love i must know

when i choose fear , fear is what i see in every turn. when i choose love, i see the love that has always been  and always will be there, sitting with me guarding me, walking with me into the way ahead

it is simple to understand. it is not easy to know.

i shall keep on going.

loving more all the while.